10.2.10

a girl can dream.

woo hoo! kudos to me for being able to do a lil bit of organizing here.

moving on..

lately, i've been really thinking about a lot. Life, love, school, and surprisingly, about my FUTURE. Yes,dear earthlings. I am constantly thinking about how i want myself to be five to ten years from now [the best part is where i get to have my very own dream house and DSLR. yey!]. I get to have my own room. I will be having lots and lots of picture taken from my very own , a DSLR hopefully. My eyes will be all glued to my on sleepless nights updating my blog in my own domain or finishing my lesson plan for my grade school classes. And if i grew tired of teaching, i`d be glad to start my own business. Ohhh, blame all these dreams to my constant exposure to the internet.  I know some people may say that too much of it can really do someone no good. but hey, look at me now. I get inspired by all those good things i get to encounter online. To cut things short, internet, specifically bloghopping, has been a big part in building up my dreams. Having to read posts of people from all walks of life who willingly share about their dreams and accomplishments have inspired me to build my own dreams too and have my own achievements as well. Certainly, i have learned a lot from the internet.


But, a lot could happen during those 5-10 years that may change these dreams of mine. A lot of challenges will most definitely try to disrupt me from reaching my goals but i know that it is in every decision i will have to make during those easy and tough moments that will define what my future is gonna be. So to serve as a guide in making the right decisions, i want to post here this article i got from candymag.com that will somehow guide me in making the tough choices of my life.


How To Make That Decision


Losing your head to so many options? Get a grip on these decision-making skills.


posted on February 2, 2010 06:00 pm

Imagine yourself plunked in the middle of a huge mall with P1,000,000 in your hands. What would you do? Spend all your money on clothes? Treat your friends to lunch at your favorite resto? Spend the day with a group of orphans in a theme park? The choices are endless and if you aren't equipped with the right tools, you could spend the whole day just gaping at all the decisions you have to make.

Like a hypothetical mall, the world offers you an endless stream of decisions, from the moment you get out of bed until the time you sleep. Sometimes, the choices are easy, like whether to go out with your barkada on Saturday afternoon or to stay home and study for that Chem exam you've got on Monday. Other times, the choices are more difficult: should you smoke and drink? Should you get into a relationship or not? Or what course should you take in college?

It might not always be easy, but with a few tips in mind, decision-making can be simplified!

Realizing It

"You can't make a choice unless you realize there's a need to make one," says Me-K Cruz, a BS psychology graduate from UP Diliman. Whether it's about what you're going to wear to your best friend's birthday party or how you should spend your money-you can only make decisions when you figure out that they have to be made. Sometimes it even takes a while before you realize you have to make a choice. Reena, 16, says that one of the toughest decisions she's ever had to make was choosing to leave her long-time barkada. For a long time she felt she couldn't connect with them anymore. They also made fun of her a lot. After a time, she decided they weren't real friends and stopped hanging out with them. Though it was painful, she eventually found new friends she felt really comfortable with and who nourished her spirit.

Options, options, options!

If like Kyla you figure out that a decision has to be made, the next thing to do is to consider your options. You can turn to your peers or your parents for advice. Either way, it's important to expose yourself to the different options that are presented to you before you make a choice. That way, you're aware of all the consequences of the choice you're eventually going to make.

Gia and Tiffany, both 16, say that one of the most pressing choices they have to make is what course to take in college. Although they turn to their friends for advice most of the time, serious matters, like which college to attend requires asking help from their parents. Kena, 16, shares that your parents' opinion is important, especially in deciding whether you should get into a romantic relationship. "Teens always need a little advice from their parents because they are more knowledgeable about life and are more understanding and sensitive to their children's feelings," says April Rose P. Lina, a psychology graduate from DLSU. It might be a little difficult to open up to your parents since most of the time it's your friends you turn to when faced with these situations. But don't be afraid to try asking the parentals for help. The generation gap between you, mom, and dad might make you want to rely on your friends more. "Teens think that their parents don't understand them because they are either too old-fashioned or baduy. They can't relate since they don't watch MTV, Gossip Girl, Glee, or any of the teen shows," says Lina. It probably requires a big stretch of the imagination to think that your parents have experienced the same things you're going through. But it's always a good idea to seek out your parents or an older person for advice because they most probably have gone through what you're going through. They are wiser and their life experiences will surely help a great deal. Keeping the communication lines open between you and your parents is key-asking them for advice won't just help you make up your mind, it'll also strengthen the ties between you.

How do I choose thee? Let me count the ways!

Once you've figured out the different options handed to you, it would be a good idea to consider each of them carefully. There are a million and one ways to think about your options-some based completely on fate while others are based on a good balance between reason and your emotions.

It might be fun to look for signs when making decisions, but it might not really be a good idea to base your decisions on fickle "signs." Tossing a coin to decide on what CD to listen to is one thing, but figuring out what college you want to go to based on heads or tails is a completely different story. Things may have worked out for Chuck Bass, who bought a hotel instead of going to college-but doing the same thing just because it worked� for a fictitious TV character might not be such a wise idea.

You can make the classic pros and cons list, which is good because it lays out all the aspects of the choice you have to make right in front of your eyes. Once you've seen all the good points and the bad points side by side, it might clear your head a little and set you thinking straight. Gia, 16, says that when she had to decide about who to ask to her prom, she went through a process of elimination. Considering your options one by one and slowly ticking them off would probably leave you with the best possible choice.

Ever hear about going with gut feel, or how the first instinct is always the right one? Cruz says, "Intuition doesn't always follow because it is influenced by that very moment. It's ruled by emotions and you should always strike a balance between logic and emotions."

It's your choice

"Peer pressure is common for teenagers because it's part of their social development," says Cruz. It's typical that peers play a big part in influencing choices because you spend majority of your time with your friends.� And although peers, and sometimes authority figures are key players in the decisions that teens make, Cruz says that another factor that affects decision-making is your personality. Although you can get the opinions of others, what ultimately matters is how you feel about it. Sometimes your peers may give the kind of advice that will just "make you feel better." Gia says that asking for "guy advice" from friends might be a little misleading-you might not get totally honest and upfront answers because your friends always want to cushion the blow and not say anything too hurtful. "You are the biggest factor," says Tiffany, 16, "although you should try to get some input from other people too." No matter what others tell you and no matter how your outside influences try to sway you, always remember that the final decsion is still up to you. It is your life that will be affected by the choices you make.

"In making any decision, you should always think about yourself and how you may benefit and grow from the choices you make," says Lina. Decisions primarily have to do with your life. "But don't forget that you do not live alone. You also have to consider others because you cannot have a life without them."

Trial and Error

Decision-making is easier said than done. Considering your options may help, but it isn't a guarantee that you're going to get the effect that you want. The good thing about making decisions is that you get better the more you practice. "I try to learn from those decisions," Em, 15, says about the wrong choices she made. Although things might not always turn out the way you plan them, just remember that life is always full of choices, and you'll never run out of opportunities to make things better.

Hopefully after five to ten years, i will just not having the same dreams but actually living them. So help me God. [Which reminds me, i haven't talk to the One up there for like ever! tee hee.]



So uhmmm, that's about it. Amma scram now. Still got this English 20 report tomorrow which obviously, i have to work on. eekkk!

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